Things to Stop Saying
Words That Don't Mean What You Think
By CRACKED Staff, Tim Cameron
#1 Irregardless
People think it means:
Regardless.
Actually means: Nothing. Nothing at all. Not a word. The problem with this one is "regardless" already means something isn't worth regard (that's why the "less" is there) so adding the "ir" to it means... it's worth regarding again? Who knows.
#2Peruse
People think it means:
To skim over or browse something.
Actually means:
Almost the opposite of that.
Peruse means "to read with thoroughness or care." If you peruse a book, you leave no page unturned. This makes sense when you consider the Middle English per use, meaning "to wear out or use up." Unfortunately, if you "consider the Middle English" very often when speaking, you're probably not exactly the life of the party.
#3 Ironic
People think it means:
Any kind of amusing coincidence.
Actually means:
An outcome that is the opposite of what you'd expect.
#4 Pristine
People think it means:
"Spotless" or "as good as new."
Actually means:
"Ancient, primeval; in a state virtually unchanged from the original."
It's therefore perfectly possible to have a pristine mountain of fossilized brontosaurus poop, but if you were to buff that pile to a lustrous shine, it would no longer be pristine.
#5 Enormity
People think it means:
Enormous.
Actually means:
Outrageous or heinous on a grand scale.
War crimes are enormities. Extra-big bouncy castles are not.
#6 Plethora
People think it means:
A lot of something.
Actually means:
Too much of something, an over-abundance.
And my own personal pet peeve:
#7 Acrosst
People think it means: The same as across.
Actually means:
NOTHING! Well, it means you have bad grammar, really.
One might think I'm mean for talking about my personal pet peeve of the use of the word "acrosst," but I'm not (By the way, 1-6 weren't mine. I use most of those words incorrectly!). I'm doing a favor in a non-public humiliation way. That way you won't say it at a party and most the people there won't be thinking "wow, that was horrific grammar." Guys I swear I'm not mean, I just hate it when I hear "acrosst."
By CRACKED Staff, Tim Cameron
#1 Irregardless
People think it means:
Regardless.
Actually means: Nothing. Nothing at all. Not a word. The problem with this one is "regardless" already means something isn't worth regard (that's why the "less" is there) so adding the "ir" to it means... it's worth regarding again? Who knows.
#2Peruse
People think it means:
To skim over or browse something.
Actually means:
Almost the opposite of that.
Peruse means "to read with thoroughness or care." If you peruse a book, you leave no page unturned. This makes sense when you consider the Middle English per use, meaning "to wear out or use up." Unfortunately, if you "consider the Middle English" very often when speaking, you're probably not exactly the life of the party.
#3 Ironic
People think it means:
Any kind of amusing coincidence.
Actually means:
An outcome that is the opposite of what you'd expect.
#4 Pristine
People think it means:
"Spotless" or "as good as new."
Actually means:
"Ancient, primeval; in a state virtually unchanged from the original."
It's therefore perfectly possible to have a pristine mountain of fossilized brontosaurus poop, but if you were to buff that pile to a lustrous shine, it would no longer be pristine.
#5 Enormity
People think it means:
Enormous.
Actually means:
Outrageous or heinous on a grand scale.
War crimes are enormities. Extra-big bouncy castles are not.
#6 Plethora
People think it means:
A lot of something.
Actually means:
Too much of something, an over-abundance.
And my own personal pet peeve:
#7 Acrosst
People think it means: The same as across.
Actually means:
NOTHING! Well, it means you have bad grammar, really.
One might think I'm mean for talking about my personal pet peeve of the use of the word "acrosst," but I'm not (By the way, 1-6 weren't mine. I use most of those words incorrectly!). I'm doing a favor in a non-public humiliation way. That way you won't say it at a party and most the people there won't be thinking "wow, that was horrific grammar." Guys I swear I'm not mean, I just hate it when I hear "acrosst."
posted by Breanne King at
12:28 PM
2 Comments:
Barb in full force. This post speaks to the deepest and innermost part of my being. It must be genetic.
This was great! I use most of those words incorrectly I guess! Thanks for the smile!
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home