Friday, October 31, 2008

Pleading...!

Guys, I don't want you to feel like our friendship is contingent upon anything. I want you just to feel unconditional love from me. But lets be honest here. Sometimes there is a contingency. Like when my house is going to have final inspection on Monday (the 3rd) and my house is so not clean. And the plumbing needs finishing. And blah blah blah. So tomorrow I'm gonna be finishing all the building stupid stuff, and then Sunday night (I KNOW! The sabbath!) I'm going to clean. And here I am on my knees, praying, begging, and pleading, that I can have some help. And trust me, I'm cute when I'm feeling helpless. And I'm feeling helpless right about now.

Now the excuses...

Eddie has been gone all week and I've been relying on my Dad to do all the "manly" stuff...ie. installing toilets.

Also...I was in a coma. Never forget this! Think of the brownie points you'll earn with God. YOU HELPED THE DISABLED GIRL! Never mind that my coma was over 3 years ago, still! Think of all the crap people who are presumed as retarded go through, and then you'll feel charitable. Help me!

Just leave a comment (or email me at breanneking@gmail.com) and let me know what I can do to get you to come. Like "I will come if you provide ding-dongs" or whatever YOU want.

Another thing, don't feel like I will hate you if you can't come because you live out of state, or you have a family reunion this weekend....only if you feel its more important to go to the fireside or something...Guys I am SOO kidding! ...sort of....

But really, only slight pressure from me.

Please come help me clean windows, and vacuum, and clean bathtubs, and remember...Many hands make light work! So please tell you friend that there is service to be done. Or your sister. Or cousin.

Have I begged enough? 5 PM on Sunday, November 2nd, 2008. Please let me know if you can come. Heaven forbid I get all ready for helpers and then no one is there. If no one can come, thats fine. I'll deal. But I just don't want to expect something and then not have it happen. And my house is on 400 E 127 S in Provo. The brown house in between two green ones. And just thing...you get a sneak peek.

Please. Please. Please.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Bobble Head Eddie

Check out how cute my husband is as a bobble head!


He's at a conference in NYC and here is his display

They've got Eddie on a banner, Eddie as a bobble head, and they real live Asian Eddie too!

Monday, October 27, 2008

What I Know For Sure

Oprah always asks this question, and to be honest, I want to be Oprah. Except in some ways, I'd rather be me. I know for sure I like me. But really, what do you know for sure? Not involving Christ, which I hope we all know for sure. But besides that, what do you know? ANSWER ME THIS! What do you know for sure?

I'll start:

I know that Eddie always has my best interest in mind. He always wants the best for me, even if its not.



I also know that the forbidden city is FREEZING in December, but then again, most places are.

I know that there are a billion things to learn from my experience in the hospital

Mostly involving pushing a stick...

I know that we're all going to be fine despite this "financial crisis," which really is the lamest excuse for a crisis ever because everyone will be unscathed, and crises usually involve something bad happening.

NOW IT YOUR TURN!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, October 20, 2008

I Am A Domestic Goddess

And let me tell you how that came about. I bought a very incredibly cute apron. And it just so happens that I do love to bake. Really, I like to make any form of dessert. So without further explanation, here is my new love that makes me THE BEST HOUSEWIFE EVER!



How can a girl have an apron like that an not be an incredible, domestic, housewife. You see, I got a large amount of aprons (like 10) for my wedding but they're all the skirt sized apron (I swear they all got together and decided I need an apron so I cook more or something! Don't get me wrong, they're all darling but I wanted a full sized one. I swear, if you gave me a skirt one I meant what I said in the thank you card: I LOVE IT! And I use it lots). So isn't that one just special?!

Friday, October 10, 2008

Here is a New Feature

I've never seen this before! Maybe you have, I don't know. But how sad/ridiculous/funny is this? Gmail has this new feature that we can activate that enforces a quick test before you send an email at a certain time of day. Its called "mail goggles." One must prove they're in the right state of mind by responding to a few simple math problems before they email and tell their big crush that there is love.

This is why we paid attention in math class! So we can prove we're not drunk! But if the test to prove you're not drunk involves touching your finger to your nose, well then I am screwed. Can't do that!

Here is it. Tell me if you can do it. If it wasn't for my Nintendo DS brain games, I wouldn't be so good at my multiplication tables.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Weiner Poopy

Ok This is funny. My soon to be new neighbor, Ashley Warcup, told me to look this up a while ago and I just did, and I think its silly. I know most of you have probably already seen this, but its new to me. So please, enjoy.



Here are some of my favorite highlights...

~When the lady is explaining how the ransomer must be kid because of the little lines around the word Jesus because "no adult is going to waste time doing that." she's a real Sherlock, guys.

~ "I thought 'my gosh- sometime like that is going to be safe in your yard.' It wasn't. It wasn't." So dejected.

And although this video is funny, it makes me sad. Because it makes me realize that I am not funny. Not at all. And whoever "stole Jesus," they're funny. They're funny.